The Beginning of a Demise.

What happens when you begin to doubt everything you thought you stood for? When everything familiar and safe suddenly isn't? Why is it so easy to let go of people who you saw as a safety net?

It's because we're human. We have a natural inkling to screw up everything good in our life because we're not pleased with how it is already. We could be living almost so perfectly and still find ourselves unsatisfied. The innate thirst for something greater and bigger than our selves is what drives our species. It's also what runs us into the ground.

You can have your head smothered into the muddy ground. You can be bruised until you're completely numb. You can even cut your hair beyond repair... but all of this will not keep you from that lust. It's a hunger so strong it can not be satiated. The need is almost parasitic and won't go away no matter how many times you find yourself on the floor.

I've had this thirst. I still do and I'm trying to get rid of it. I often wonder. Why can't I just be happy with what I have now? Maybe it's because I'm not happy. I'll always want and plunder for more and more until finally... I'll have it all. I'll be happy, right? Something that's burdening my shoulders tells me... No, you won't be happy.